On our street。。。
On our street。。。 (第1/3页)
Onourstreet,fourteengarbagecansarenowmissing.ThegarbagecansfromOneSeventeenandOneNeendisappearedlastnight.Thisisnotaseriousmatter,butontheotherhandwecantsitupallnightwatchingoverourgarbagecans.Itisprobablybestdescribedasanannoyance.OneTwelve,OneTwenty-twoandOneThirty-onehaveboughtnewplasticgarbagecansatBarneysHardwaretoreplacethosemissing.Wearethusdownelevengarbagecans.Manypeopleareusinglargedarkplasticgarbagebags.Thenewconstructionatthehospitalattheendoftheblockhasdisplacedanumberofrats.Ratsarenotmuchbotheredbyplasticgarbagebags.Infact,ifIwereorderedtoimaginewhatmightmostprofitablybeinventedbyacommitteeofrats,itwouldbetheplasticgarbagebag.Theratsrunupanddownourstreetallnightlong.
IfIwereorderedtoimaginewhoisstealingourgarbagecans,Icouldnot.Iverymuchdoubtthatmywifeisdoingit.Someofthegarbagecansonourstreetarebatteredmetal,othersareheavygreenplastic.Heavygreenplasticorheavyblackplasticpredominates.Someofthegarbagecanshavethenumbersofthehousestheybelongtopaintedontheirsidesorlids,withwhitepaint.Usuallybysomeonewithonlythecrudestsenseoftheartoflettering.OneNeen,whichhasamongitstenantsagiftedcommercialartist,isanexception.Nooneexcessivelyfamouslivesonourstreet,tomyknowledge,thereforethemorbidattentionthatthegarbageofthefamoussometimesattractswouldnotbeafactor.ThePrecinctsaysthatnootherstreetwithintheprecincthasreportedsimilarproblems.
Ifmywifeisstealingthegarbagecans,inthenight,whileIamdrunkandasleep,whatisshedoingwiththem?Theyarenotinthecellar,Ivelooked(althoughIdontlikegoingdowntothecellar,eventoreplaceablownfuse,becauseoftherats).MywifehasayellowPontiacconvertible.NoonehastheseanymorebutIcanimagineherliftinggarbagecansintothebackseatoftheyellowPontiacconvertible,attwooclockinthemorning,whenIamdreamingofbeingonstage,dreamingofhavingtoperformadrumconcertowithonlyonedrumstick
Onourstreet,twenty-onegarbagecansarenowmissing.NewinfamieshavebeenannouncedbyOneThirty-hroughOneForty-three——seveninarow,andonthesamesideofthestreet.Also,depredationsatOneSixteenandOneSixty-four.WehaveputoutdozensofcansofD-Conbuttheratsignorethem.WhyshouldtheygofortheD-ConwhentheycanhavetheremnantsofEllenBussesBoeufRossini,forwhichsheisknownforsixblocksineverydirection?Weeatwell,onthisstreet,theresnodenyingit.ExceptforthenursingstudentsatOneFifty-eight,andwhyshouldtheyeatwell,theyrestudents,aretheynot?Mywif
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